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Change Your Story, Change Your Life – By Jeannette Maw |
When was the last time you told someone new the story of your life? We
don’t come upon these opportunities often, but when we do, it’s extremely
telling not only about our perspective on life, but about how the rest of
our lives will unfold! Who said crystal balls don’t exist? Just listen to
yourself talk, and you’ll know all there is to know.
What Our Stories Reveal
You’ve heard and told your share of stories, chatting with moms at the
kids’ swimming lessons, sitting in the middle seat of a long flight, or in
the chair at the hair salon. People tell their stories, and when they do,
it’s a unique opportunïty for examination. It isn’t so much what has or
hasn’t happened to them that’s important, but their perception of what’s
happened that’s key. That perception reveals their core beliefs and
determines how life will continue to unfold for them. Same goes for you!
Knowing this, it seems wise to pay attention to how we tell our own life
stories. If we spot our personal sabotage in the story, we can change how
we tell it and create a happy ending. That’s not saying we should create
fiction when we talk about our lives, but just pay attention to the
beliefs we hold about what’s happened and what’s possible for us.
Victim or Thriver?
I was surprised to overhear a friend summing up my history with men by
saying I had a string of failed relationships and no hope of finding “the
one.” Ugh! As I was about to disagree with her, I realized it would be
very easy to interpret my experience in that light, although I certainly
saw it differently. I thought of myself as a lucky girl who had the
opportunïty to meet, know, and have fun with a wide variety of men and
relished the fact that I wasn’t searching for “one” but rather was having
fun with “lots”! Both of us spoke the truth from our personal perspective,
but I like my version better!
Here’s another example of how easily perspectives can change. Paula is
just re-entering the dating scene after her second divorce. As she meets
new people, she tells each one the story of her life. It goes something
like: “...raised Mormon by a mother suffering from depression and a father
who was manipulated by his wïfe throughout their entire marriage. The boys
in the family were favored over the girls, and we girls didn’t get much
love or attention from anyone. I nevër felt included or supported.”
Can you imagine the feelings this story creates for Paula each time she
tells it? Neglect, lack of love, and resentment are natural by-products of
a narrative like this. The truth is just a matter of perspective
sometimes.
With a purposeful intention to focus on the positive, Paula’s story could
just as easily be: “I was raised in a close-knit community with strong
family values, by parents who had little to give, but nevër gave up doing
their best for us kids. They had a houseful of us, and growing up with
siblings really enriched my life. I learned a lot from mom and dad about
myself and the type of parent and wïfe I wanted to be.”
From victim mentality to survivor and even to thriver is sometimes just a
matter of what reality you present to yourself and others. There’s
something good to be found in every experience -- and gaining that
viewpoint regularly will change the way your path unfolds!
What’s Your Story?
So what story are you telling? Is your mother-in-law interfering in your
marriage? Are your genes preventing you from good health? Do you not have
enough time in the day to take care of yourself? Does your employer
discriminate against people like you?
What story would you rather tell? Believe it or not, it all starts with
your story -- with what you believe is possible. Tell the story first, or
at least stop telling the one that doesn’t work, and THEN your life will
reflect new possibilities. And it will be a pleasure to hear your story as
a seatmate on your next transatlantic flight!
About the Author:
Jeannette Maw is an Attraction Coach and founder of Good Vibe Coaching.
She specializes in helping her clients get what they want by harnessing
the power of the Law of Attraction. Learn more about Jeannette and the Law
of Attraction at:
http://www.goodvibecoach.com
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